The 4th of July

What does the 4th of July mean to you? Is it a day of remembering our veterans who fought for America’s freedom? Is it a day to spend around friends and family? Is it a day to get away- or a day of solace and reflection?

For me I’ve always enjoyed the celebration aspect of the 4th of July with my family. It’s been the first holiday in a long time where we’ve all been together without any serious issues and we all gathered together to enjoy good food, good laughs and good fun.

I’m sad to see my oldest daughter go back to her group home- but have faith that things will work themselves out and she will be home permanently sooner than I think. I know she’s stable with the right medication regiment. She’s working harder at expressing her emotions appropriately- and knowing when she’s intentional about pushing her emotional pain on others versus when her own feelings are hurt. She knows how to express love and receive love- so we continue to praise her maturation and development into adulthood.

We have difficulty with the words love and trust though with our children. I believe they go hand in hand- and you can’t go into either without complete intention. There’s no “I trust him a little bit”- you either trust someone completely or you don’t trust them at all. I still remember the time when my youngest and I were in therapy together regarding trust. The therapist wanted my youngest to close her eyes and from a standing position fall backwards. She would not know whether I would catch her before she would hit the ground- but during the exercise she would brace her legs for the fall and open her eyes as well.

This taught us a lot about her level of trust in me- and it’s difficult to gain trust until she sees that in a crisis I could save her. I can’t convince her with my words- my actions have to be put into play. It didn’t matter that during the exercise, I caught her every time. She didn’t trust that I would- and I have no idea how to convince her otherwise.

Remember the joys of summer, even when it’s very hot and humid. Be thankful for the freedoms around us, the ability to express your thoughts and feelings and preserve this freedom for future generations. So many parts of society want to reign people into categories or groups- forsaking the fact that you can be a part of a team and an individual at the same time. Honor your parents, your partner, your sons and daughters.

Express gratitude- lift people up and let them know how much you appreciate the fact that they are a part of your life. Sometimes a kind word or note goes a long way to letting people know you care and you are willing to share.

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